If there is any time of the year when most Muslims are doing the same thing collectively, it’s Ramadan. For the most part, we’re all fasting, increasing our salat, reading more Qur’an and just all around focusing on increasing their deen, haqq, and nur.
While many of our non Muslim family and friends know we are abstaining from eating they may not know that there are circumstances where we as Muslims are exempt from fasting. Someone is ill, taking medication, traveling, if a woman is pregnant, nursing, or is on her menstrual cycle — all those situations excuse a person from fasting. So imagine your co-workers confusion when you walk in the office enjoying that medium iced caramel coffee with almond milk and extra caramel.
But Muslims? We should know better.
Yes there are some folks who are new to the deen and may not know about the exemptions, but many of us know. And while Ramadan is a time for self reflection and introspection, the haram police never take a vacation and some Muslims are just nosey. And to you all I have one thing to say:
Mind Ya Own Bidness.
For me, Ramadan is a personal time. I don’t need you asking me if I’m praying. Especially some of these brothas. I remember in undergrad I knew a sista named Mona. Cool as ice. I saw her on campus one time and she had this concerned look on her face. She said she was hungry. I kinda of chuckled because as a fasting person we all know that feeling. But when she told me she wasn’t fasting I asked her what’s stopping her from getting some food. She was concerned about some of the brothers on campus seeing her eat. I was flabbergasted. While some brothas may genuinely forget since menstruation isn’t something they have to deal with, some are just nosey and nasty for that matter.
If someone isn’t fasting it isn’t our responsibility to determine whether or not them not fasting is acceptable. We don’t know what people are going through physically or spiritually. If you want to be beneficial to a Muslim while fasting, then invite them to an iftar, be kind to them. Don’t walk up to them with a Super Ramadan checklist asking them what they’ve done for the day. They aren’t perfect, and neither are you. Focus on your own fast and that may just encourage some else in their own fast.